How to Make Decisions When God Seems Silent

How do you make decisions when God seems silent?

Short answer: start with what God has already said, then choose. Most of the time God's silence on your specific question isn't a riddle to solve. It's freedom. He has given you clear boundaries in His Word, wisdom when you ask for it (James 1:5) and people around you to help. Inside those, you are free to decide, and He goes with you.

That can feel too simple when you're stuck. But it's how Scripture describes God's will far more often than we expect.

Why doesn't God just tell me what to do?

Often He already has. "The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever" (Deuteronomy 29:29). Brad put it this way in his message Choose Freely: "God doesn't want you to crack a code. He wants you to open a book."

For the questions Scripture doesn't answer by name (this job or that one, this city or that one), God usually gives freedom rather than a secret answer. In the garden He told Adam, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden," with one exception (Genesis 2:16–17). Brad imagines Adam standing between two approved trees, asking which fruit is God's will, and God simply saying, "Choose." As Brad put it, "God's will is more of a field than a dot."

Isn't waiting safer than choosing wrong?

Not always. Waiting on God is right when He has told you to wait. But a lot of "waiting" is really fear. Brad named it: "A lot of us are so worried about making the wrong decision that we make no decision. And hear me: no decision is a decision."

James is even more direct: "If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn't do it, it is sin for them" (James 4:17). Endless deliberating can quietly become disobedience when God has already shown you the good thing to do.

A simple way to make a decision as a Christian

When God isn't giving you a specific word, these four questions will take you a long way. If a choice passes all four, you can make it with confidence.

1. Does the Bible say no?

Start with the fence. If Scripture forbids it, the decision is made, however you feel. "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path" (Psalm 119:105). If Scripture doesn't forbid it, you're inside the field.

2. Will it help me love God and love people?

Jesus summed up the whole law in two commands: love God with everything, and love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:37–39). A choice that pulls you away from God or uses people is the wrong one, even if it's allowed. "Whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" (1 Corinthians 10:31).

3. What do wise people who know me say?

"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed" (Proverbs 15:22). Ask people who love Jesus and love you enough to be honest. If they're all worried, slow down and listen.

4. Do I want it, and do I have peace?

Inside God's boundaries, your desires are allowed to count. Paul told a widow she was "free to marry anyone she wishes," as long as he belonged to the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:39). And let peace have a voice: "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts" (Colossians 3:15).

Then decide, and trust God with the result: "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps" (Proverbs 16:9).

What if God feels silent while I'm hurting?

Sometimes the silence isn't about a decision at all. You're praying and hearing nothing back. David knew that feeling: "How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?" (Psalm 13:1). The same psalm ends, "But I trust in your unfailing love" (Psalm 13:5).

Silence is not the same as absence. Keep praying, keep reading, and keep showing up with people who can carry you when you can't hear much yet.

Does God ever give specific direction?

Yes. Jonah was sent to Nineveh. Paul was "kept by the Holy Spirit from preaching the word in the province of Asia" and redirected to Macedonia (Acts 16:6–10). Brad told the story of someone in our church who felt God say, "Go speak to that person," at a gas station, and that person gave their life to Christ.

But notice the pattern: God usually gives specific direction to people who are already walking in what He has said. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5–6). As Brad said, "When we follow God's spoken will, He has the ability to lead us into His specific will." And if He needs to stop you, He can: "If God wants to get your attention, He'll get your attention."

Frequently asked questions

How do I know if a decision is God's will?

If it's within what Scripture allows, helps you love God and people, holds up with wise counsel and comes with peace, you can make it confidently. God's will for you is clearer than you think: "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" (1 Thessalonians 5:16–18).

Should I ask God for a sign?

Gideon asked for a sign with a fleece, and God was patient with him (Judges 6:36–40). But the Bible never makes signs the normal way to decide. Start with Scripture, prayer and counsel. If God gives you something more, receive it with gratitude.

What if I choose wrong?

God works even through our wrong turns for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). We wrote more about that in What If I Missed God's Will for My Life?

How do I hear God's voice?

Start where He speaks most clearly: His Word. Jesus said, "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me" (John 10:27). The more time you spend in Scripture, the easier it is to recognize His voice when He nudges you.

Love God, then choose freely

Brad closed his message with an old line from Augustine: "Love God, and do whatever you please." If you love God, what you please will be shaped by what pleases Him. So love Him, stay in His Word, ask for wisdom, listen to wise people, and then make the call.

This post comes from Brad Straarup's message, Choose Freely, the first message in the series How to Know God's Will. If you're wondering about one decision in particular, read Is There Only One Person God Wants You to Marry? You can find the rest of the series on the Messages page.

If you're near Chandler and want people around you for decisions like these, plan a visit and come as you are.